Scriptures for Foster Parenting (part 1)

Serving as a foster parent has become increasingly frustrating the past three months as the possibility of adopting Miracle has gone from near certainty to highly questionable. I want to share some scriptures I have meditated upon and found helpful as I try to make sense of what is happening.

1 Cor 15:58. Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

This scripture is awesome! The first attractive aspect for me is the guarantee that the work I put in for God will never be in vain (worthless). On multiple occasions I have been sorely tempted to emotionally throw in the towel and say, "Fine. If we don't get to adopt Miracle, I'm going to do the minimum because all this effort will be worthless and throw-away anyways." This situation has forced me to remember why we signed up to be foster parents in the first place. We did it to serve God by helping someone else. Somewhere along the way I ended up serving myself and I have had to rewind and refocus on serving God no matter what. Only when I am motivated by serving God can this scripture become true and can this situation make sense.

The reality is that we have given Miracle the best possible start we could at a critical juncture in her life. We can justifiably feel good that we made a difference. But again, the main point is that we served God, not whether or not we were effective.

There are other key nuggets to this scripture:

• "Let nothing move you." We need to stay the course, trust God, and not let this emotional roller coaster change how we treat Miracle or anyone else involved in this situation from our high highs to our low lows. Only with God can we access this stability.
  
• "Always give yourself fully." In what areas of my life am I an "always" and a "fully"? There will always be new ways to give myself even more. God values our effort more than results. All he asks is for wholeheartedness. Halfhearted effort to love anyone is really an empty way to live. Who wants to look back at their life and say, "Yep, I gave it a good 65% effort"?! If anyone deserves our 100%, surely it is our God!
  

Romans 8:28. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

This is one of the most popular scriptures. It is easy to apply in the good times. Many even develop magical thinking based on this scripture, particularly for those who subscribe to the so-called "prosperity gospel" (God wants to make me rich).

What is the actual promise? Exactly what it says! Let's work backwards. The promise is for those who love God and have been called according to his purpose. While not everyone loves God, everyone has been called because God has a single purpose for everyone (1 Tim 2:4). Those who truly love God are able to trust that he has good things in store for them and is at work for their good. Therefore, their eyes are open to see how God is working for their good, no matter the circumstances. The basic requirement for open eyes is faith (Hebrews 11).

Joseph's story is a classic example where he toiled for 13 years in slavery and prison, yet God ultimately made him vice-president of a powerful nation. Ultimately, God reunited Joseph with his family and saved everyone from starvation. When Joseph's father Jacob died, his brothers fear that Joseph would take revenge on them since they sold him into slavery. Instead, Joseph's faith enabled him to take the high road. "But Joseph said to them, 'Don't be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives'" (Gen 50:19-20).

Following Joseph's example, I can already see how God has worked for my good the last few months through this challenging situation:

• Drawing me closer to God. Why does it take challenges to help me do well spiritually? Nevertheless, I've been having great quiet times on surrender and the scriptures and promises of God in new & refreshing ways.
  
• Drawing me closer to others. I am very independent by nature and this is a great chance to be open with others, allow them to encourage me, and not be afraid to ask for help or be vulnerable.
• Opening my eyes to the beauty and value in each precious moment I have with Miracle and Jade. Life is uncertain and I better enjoy each moment, even if I'm cleaning up baby vomit when I'd rather be accomplishing something useful on the house. Or typing out my quiet time thoughts when Miracle is bugging me right now for my attention :-)...
• Teaching me to love rather than judge. It is very easy to find fault with any and every player in this mini-drama, from the birth mother to the social workers to the lawyers. Instead, it is much more rewarding (albeit challenging) to not just tolerate people but to truly love and connect with them and understand their point of view.
• Reminding me that I am not in the place of God (see Joseph's words above). God knows what is best for Miracle and he is completely capable of running her little life exactly how he wants. For that matter, God also knows exactly what is best for me and my family. We may not see it as convenient, but if we're surrendered to his leadership, then we will benefit in all the spiritual & intangible areas that really count.