Death Part 2: Friendly Death?

In my last blog, I built a case for Death as an enemy. This time I will examine the flip side and thus the title has a question mark in it.

Purpose from Death
Life has a natural rhythm to it. We are born and we start growing physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. By the time we are 20, we have finished growing physically and have a period of time where we have seemingly boundless energy. What if that period never ended?

Workaholics and overachievers might imagine that they would push themselves indefinitely, enjoying their relative invincibility (but isn't that a self-made hell?). But for anyone with even one lazy bone in their body, having forever to accomplish things is actually a curse. Prov. 20:4 states, "A sluggard does not plow in season; so at harvest time he looks but finds nothing."

The truth is that all of us procrastinate to one degree or another. Knowing we have a finite time in which to accomplish the things that matter most to us benefits us in two ways. 1) We accomplish more than we otherwise would. 2) We experience a feeling of purpose in working toward our goals that might be absent if we had an infinite amount of time.

Job 14:5-12 summarizes our mortality nicely:

⁵ Man's days are determined;
you have decreed the number of his months
and have set limits he cannot exceed....

⁷ "At least there is hope for a tree:
If it is cut down, it will sprout again,
and its new shoots will not fail.

⁸ Its roots may grow old in the ground and its stump die in the soil,
⁹ yet at the scent of water it will bud and put forth shoots like a plant.
¹⁰ But man dies and is laid low; he breathes his last and is no more.

¹¹ As water disappears from the sea or a riverbed becomes parched and dry,
¹² so man lies down and does not rise; till the heavens are no more, men will not awake or be roused from their sleep.
In summary, many human beings accomplish far more and experience a sense of purpose during their years of finite life than they otherwise might if they lived on this earth forever.

Death as a Friend for the Suffering

This blog would be incomplete without acknowledging the relief that death can bring to those who are suffering with a terminal illness. Jack Kevorkian became a poster-child for the issue with his "death machine." Recently, Oregon, Washington, and Montana have constitutionally-verified laws that legalize assisted suicide.

Death Removes the Bad People
Let's expand our thinking beyond ourselves and consider the implications to this world if the evil people never died. Is that a world that you want to see? What if the world continued to accumulate the Hitlers, Stalins, Pol Pots, Osama bin Ladens, and Saddam Husseins?

Justice is a huge theme in the Bible. David and many of the prophets cried out for God to judge the wicked. In general, the reality is that evil rulers have rarely held sway for more than a decade or two at most.

2 Peter 2:4-9 summarizes God's ability to judge and hold people accountable. "⁴For if God did not spare angels when they sinned, but sent them to hell, putting them into gloomy dungeons to be held for judgment; ⁵if he did not spare the ancient world when he brought the flood on its ungodly people, but protected Noah, a preacher of righteousness, and seven others; ⁶if he condemned the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah by burning them to ashes, and made them an example of what is going to happen to the ungodly; ⁷and if he rescued Lot, a righteous man, who was distressed by the filthy lives of lawless men ⁸(for that righteous man, living among them day after day, was tormented in his righteous soul by the lawless deeds he saw and heard)— ⁹if this is so, then the Lord knows how to rescue godly men from trials and to hold the unrighteous for the day of judgment, while continuing their punishment."

Most of us have experienced an unruly, combattive, incorrigible, rebellious child. Such children can make my blood boil in anger and yet when I stop to reflect, I also get depressed. This is because such children become teenagers, and eventually adults. However challenging they might be, problems in children are more manageable than in adults. Yet this scripture tells us that God is fully capable of dealing with even the most determined, rebellious, and defiant adult.

The amazing thing is that God even applies this justice righteously, with compassion and love. It is really difficult to take such an attitude toward someone you believe deserves tremendous punishment. How do I know God has this attitude? Jesus' example! After he rants at the Pharisees as a last-ditch effort to get them to repent in Matthew 23, Jesus mourns, "O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing."

I believe God keeps upping the ante in individuals' lives, trying to get their attention and get them to repent. After a certain point, he is left with no recourse but to end their life as a natural consequence for what they've done. This is perhaps the most merciful act that God could offer someone, and far from the concept of an everlasting hell. Rev. 20:11-15 clearly teaches that people will suffer a finite amount exactly commensurate with their sins.

In sum, Death is a tool in the hands of a just and righteous God to make life liveable and deal with those who choose an evil path and reject him.

Death Brings Humility
Every human being is susceptible to the sin of pride. We naturally get excited about our abilities and eventually grow overconfident in our ability to handle life. I've realized that I need to change the language with which I talk to my kids from "You did it yourself" to "We did it" or "You did it." But a change in language alone won't prevent pride. Humility must be learned. Over and over and over again.

"Meet Joe Black" is an intriguing movie where Death is embodied as Brad Pitt who comes as a visitor to an aging businessman who is not yet ready to let go of life. Death helps us develop humility because we have so little control over it. About the only thing we can do is choose to die early and possibly the manner in which we die. We have no choice about whether or not we die.

The reality is that our lives are very short-lived and we think of ourselves much more highly than we ought. The Psalmist reflected in Psalms 39:4-7,

4 Show me, O LORD, my life's end
and the number of my days;
let me know how fleeting is my life.

5 You have made my days a mere handbreadth;
the span of my years is as nothing before you.
Each man's life is but a breath.

6 Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro:
He bustles about, but only in vain;
he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it.

7 "But now, Lord, what do I look for?
My hope is in you.

When we consider the duration of our lives and those who have gone before us, we turn to God as our only source of hope. The wisest man ever (Solomon) gained humility in the realization that his destiny is no different than the animals. Ecclesiastes 3 states, "¹⁸ I also thought, 'As for men, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. ¹⁹ Man's fate is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath'; man has no advantage over the animal. Everything is meaningless. ²⁰ All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return."

In Ecclesiastes 9, Solomon exposes the pointless struggle to achieve and accumulate wealth. We certainly cannot take it with us after we die so why go to such bother? Furthermore, living life for yourself will most certainly disqualify you for any afterlife.

³ This is the evil in everything that happens under the sun: The same destiny overtakes all. The hearts of men, moreover, are full of evil and there is madness in their hearts while they live, and afterward they join the dead. ⁴ "Anyone who is among the living has hope"—even a live dog is better off than a dead lion!

⁵ For the living know that they will die, but the dead know nothing;
they have no further reward, and even the memory of them is forgotten.

⁶ Their love, their hate and their jealousy have long since vanished;
never again will they have a part in anything that happens under the sun.

Solomon's warning is clear: figure things out with God while you're still alive! Death is a gift that grants us a measure of humility and shows us our need for God. It reveals who is really in charge, and it ain't me!

Conclusion

I hope this blog has challenged your traditional viewpoint of Death. Death can give purpose and urgency to our lives because we know we have only a limited time. At a deeper level, however, we must realize that this life is simply a test. A finite life grants us a measure of humility that is enough to show us our need for God. Knowing someone who has recently died causes each of us to reconsider our mortality, and that is a good thing. Lastly, because of Death, we can be grateful that evil people inevitably eliminate one another. Thankfully, there are no 30 billion-year-old ugly grudges!

Death part 1: "Fear of Death"

One of my ministers (Scott Green) delivered yet another powerful sermon this past Sunday(11/15/2009). He spoke about the word “goal,” which only appears five times in the Bible. His final point addressed “the goal of faith” in 1 Peter 1:9, which is to dodge death and receive eternal life. I wanted to devote several blog entries to exploring the topic of death. I will attempt to hold to the following outline: 1) the Fear of Death, 2) Death as a Friend, and 3) Choices in Death.

My experience of death has generally not been filled with fear. Various church members died when I was a kid, but at that time as a Seventh-Day Adventist, I already knew that they would remain in the grave and then be resurrected once Jesus came back. Since the only people I knew were SDA’s, death occurred to me as an extra-long nap. However, I did have great fear of leaving the SDA denomination because then the magic formula would no longer work. As a child, I pondered how our neighbors could possibly live their lives without the absolute security that they would receive eternal life when they died.

A large number of my relatives passed away in my teens and twenties (1990-96) and my parents were very positive role models in how to face each situation without being in denial. The first was my 99-year-old Grandma Leiske who had literally experienced the horse and buggy days. Sadly, the second was her daughter, my great Auntie Myrna, who died in her 60’s having enjoyed her multiple grandchildren for only a few short years. The third was my second cousin Michael Wiggins, who was cut down at the age of 24, tragically leaving a grieving wife and his two parents who happened to teach at the same college that I attended. Fourth was my Aunt Carol, who contracted multiple myeloma in her early 50’s and thankfully made good use of the several years she had to bond with us and then say goodbye. Right before I graduated in 1997, my maternal grandmother died of liver disease caused by longstanding alcoholism. I viewed this as a mixed blessing for my mom, who fought to love an alcoholic woman who did not choose to love her back. After a five-year respite, my paternal grandmother died at 88, and my paternal grandfather a couple of years later at 93.

A final incident worth mentioning was the death of David Beale at age 18 or 19 the week before school started my sophomore year in college. He was an incoming freshman who had already become good friends with my roommate (and now brother-in-law) Brandon Sanders, who was also starting college that year. The entire campus was sobered by this tragic incident that occurred exactly as the school year started, but I had a unique vantage point from knowing Brandon and encountering his grief, sadness, and questions. Looking back, I’ve wondered if this was a spiritual watershed moment. That year Brandon and I had many talks about God and both embarked on a deep search for spiritual understanding.

An individual’s teens and twenties are often very formative for their belief system and personal growth, and mine was no exception. I struggled mightily to understand the meaning of life and experienced some very high highs and some low lows. In that period of life, I was unattached to a very large degree and I recall visiting a very large waterfall in eastern Washington. I started with fascination at the rushing water that fell hundreds of feet and felt like I just wanted to get swept away with it and be one with it. There was no fear of death for me at that moment because it was irrelevant to the feeling. Such bravado! But to what end? I do not think it is coincidental that we send our 18 to 25-year-olds to fight our wars.

Depression affected me rather strongly in 1999-2000. God used it to help me develop humility and see my need for him. But I’ll never forget counting the cost with the brothers. Scott Green asked me, “If you were to die today, where would you go?” At that moment, I felt very depressed and didn’t really care where I went—I just knew that I wanted to live for God. Looking back, my answer showed that I was in denial of my mortality. It was along the lines of, “It’s really up to God, I’m in his hands. If he sends me to hell, then I accept that.” That was a huge step for me because having grown up going to church, I had never honestly considered being truly “lost” and separated from God. At the same time, you can see the shreds of denial to which I still clung. After getting baptized in order to be saved and forgiven from my sins, I’ve gotten more in touch with how I do deserve to be separated from God. It is indeed a scary thought, but it keeps things real.

On a daily basis, I do not emotionally fear death—I’m focused on living a life for God! But at a survival level, I wonder how I would react if my life were truly endangered. I nearly drowned when I was five years old. When I took swimming lessons at 10 years old, I could not stand to do the “survival float” because it felt so claustrophobic. My near-drowning clearly made a deep impact on me. There have been many instances since then where I could have died: flipping my VW Rabbit on an icy road at age 16, getting hit by a car while riding a bike with poor brakes at the UW at age 24, and even an SUV narrowly missing me the other morning as I crossed the street at 6:15 am in the rain wearing a black coat.

My greatest fear in death right now centers around what would happen to my wife and kids, who would experience the rest of their lives without a husband and father. They are certainly my greatest vulnerability, the softest part of me. I think especially of my daughters—who would play that irreplaceable safe male role in their lives to give them confidence, security, and love? They each have the potential to become an incredible individual, but what sorts of choices would they make without a dad? I fear that they will turn to men in their teenage years for their security instead of to God. I fear that without a spiritual male role model, they will miss out on fully understanding God, who has both fatherly and motherly characteristics.

It is in this context of my real fears surrounding death that I share Heb 2:14-15. “Since the children have flesh and blood, he [Jesus] too shared in their humanity so that by his death he might destroy him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil—and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.” I have to be careful that my life is not lived in slavery to my fear of death. Jesus came in real flesh and blood, sharing not only our mortality but also our fears that arise out of our vulnerabilities. By facing his fears and dying on the cross, Jesus dealt a death-blow to Satan. It was a paradoxical and unprecedented act. Jesus showed us how to live life full tilt, even in the face of death (see Luke 13:31-35).

American society has taken the fear of death to entirely new levels with Halloween, Hollywood’s scary movies, and the like. Ironically, our society has embraced and glorified death and the fears it engenders. However, if each of us gets real with what we really want, I think it lines up pretty closely with the following scriptures.

“Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death” (Rev 20:14). The Bible describes that death itself will be consumed by the lake of fire and for eternity forward, it will no longer exist. What a radical concept to break the life/death duality!

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away” (Rev 21:4). Isn’t this what we all want? God knows us so well. The point that jumped out at me today was the phrase “every tear,” which implies that God knows the reason and source for every pain and tear we have cried. He knows, he understands, and he can’t wait to comfort us and make it all better.

Freedom From Religion (part 2)

In my previous blog, I introduced the Freedom From Religion (FFRF) organization and their polarizing ad campaign. Today I will explore the concept of freedom that the Bible offers and contrast this with what FFRF appears to be offering.

John 8:31-34 describes what I believe to be the real issue of freedom.

To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” They answered him, “We are Abraham’s descendants and have never been slaves of anyone. How can you say that we shall be set free?” Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin.”

After his preaching in the synagogue earlier in John 8, some Jews had indeed believed in him, but Jesus called them to actually do something about it and obey his teaching. Instead of following his direction, they proudly claim, “We’re Americans, we live in the land of the free and the home of the brave!” In response, Jesus basically says, “You guys don’t get it. You are a slave to your own sinful nature just like every other human on the planet.”

This is the fundamental human predicament: each of us has voluntarily enslaved ourselves to sin. It might be overeating, pornography, pride, greed, keeping a record of wrongs, drugs, alcohol, selfishness, bitterness, hate, gossip, or any number of things. If we were to take the time to be truly honest with ourselves, we find that each of us could have written Romans 7:14-20.

“We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.”

Later on in the same chapter, the Bible says that I am “a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members.”

When Jesus was speaking to the Jews, they were pretty oblivious to their real spiritual need. Surely this new prophet Jesus had something more exciting to offer than rehashing the concept of sin, the “red thread” of their scriptures. Instead, according to Matthew 1:21, Jesus came to “save his people from their sins” (his name Yeshua means “the LORD saves”).

Today, the FFRF would have us believe that religion is oppressing us and keeping us from being fully self-expressed and living powerful lives. In a sense, I fully agree! The Jews who believed Jesus were tempted to leave it at just that: belief. Religion in America today is pathetic and can be summarized as, “Pray Jesus into your brain and then do whatever you want.” Statistically, divorce among believers (true Christ-ians would follow Matt 19:1-12) is just as high in America as for non-believers. If we could eliminate the powerless religion that holds sway over so many, that would be awesome! Imagine if people either completely disobeyed Jesus or obeyed him wholeheartedly. There would then be a very clear connection between Jesus’ teaching and freedom from sin.

I find it very sad that Dan Barker of the FFRF experienced a powerless religion that could not save its hearers in this world. He rightly rejected it. No one in the church in which I grew up helped me with my sin either. Unfortunately, Dan threw the baby out with the bathwater and rejected God along with the religion. Instead, he made himself into his own god by declaring and inventing his own beliefs as truth. Without anything ultimate, he is proverbially up a creek without a paddle:

• What happens when you die? If you go into nothingness, what was the point of life in this world? I began, I lived, I ended. What a tiny game to play for individuals who are literally geniuses!
• Yes, you can set people free from religion, but how are you going to help them deal with sin and the real problems in their lives?
• Without a “common ultimate” or accountability at the end of our lives, where is the grounds for living a moral life and condemning the Hitlers of this world?
• How do I impress values and morals on my children yet avoid being “god” to them when they come of age? What prevents them from inventing their own morality and becoming the next Hitler?

As an intellectual, I have wrestled with each of these questions. I have also looked down on those who were not “broadminded” enough to even ask these questions. At the end of the day, I’ve realized I just need to humble out and admit I need something beyond myself. I have found that my intellectual ability can be an asset, but it can also be a tremendous liability. 1 Cor 1:18-25 explains that intellectualism most certainly can prevent us from being free.

"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved, it is the power of God. For it is written, 'I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate.' Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? There is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. For the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength."

For myself, I know I have experienced my limits. Like Nietzsche, I chose to destroy myself and rise again, but it was on God's terms and not my own to become an "ubermensch" of my little Todd-world. On 12/15/1999 my sin and my old life were obliterated in the waters of baptism and I rose with Christ to live a new life as a slave to God rather than a slave to myself. I have learned (the hard way :-) that there is victory in surrender, that God's apparent foolishness is exactly what my "enlightened" intellectual mind actually needs.

You know, I think I’ve convinced myself that I appreciate the FFRF’s advertisements. Let’s get rid of the religion and the powerless Santa-Clausy God that they mock. Those things deserve to be mocked. Like Israel on Mount Carmel, let us slay the false ideas that have led us astray and return to the true God who really can save us from our sin and grant us true freedom from our sin.

Freedom From Religion (part 1)

This entry is inspired by the bus advertisements I have seen recently on my commute sponsored by the "Freedom From Religion Foundation." It has a picture of Santa Claus saying, "Yes Virginia, there is no God." While I had to acknowledge the cleverness of the idea, I found myself emotionally incensed as well, to a degree I found surprising.

The sign mocks the idea of a belief in God as childish. It implies that it is more foolish than a belief in Santa Claus (since Santa is delivering the "truth" that has been repressed for so many years).

After calming myself, I took the time this morning to read about the FFRF on wikipedia. The organization is based in Wisconsin but also has a stronghold in Washington. Coincidentally, the FFRF's annual conference for its 13,000 members will be held soon and so apparently the ads serve double-duty as publicity for this, too.

Everyone has a story and I was intrigued to learn about the people behind this ad. Turns out that a talented married couple (Dan Barker and Anne Gaylor) head up this organization. Gaylor helped start the organization in 1978, but at that time Barker was a "Christian" minister believer who did not disavow his belief in God until 1984. Barker has written tons of materials, largely aimed to help people make atheism a normal way of life in a society that still believes. As a member of the Prometheus society, his IQ is at least in the 99.997 percentile.

But I wonder what Dan and Anne's real story is? Humans are emotional creatures. What did they experience in their church? How did Dan's relationship with God evolve over the years before he drew this intellectual conclusion? My hunch is that this information would be very telling.

Personally, 10 years ago, I was headed in a direction where I had already stopped believing the Bible was true. My conclusions were a wild mix of life and political and relational experiences in the church I attended along with my own decisions on what topics I wanted to explore as well as being in relationships and having dialogue with people who had already made similar decisions. We are inevitably impacted by our interactions with others, though ultimately we are all free agents.

Of course, this advertisement is rather polarizing. It is highly unlikely to cause any person to change their convictions because convictions arise from deep thought, research, and conscious decision. At a certain level, I too want America to be free from the powerless, impoverished version of "Christianity" that is far from what Jesus taught and more closely resembles the Phariseeism that he preached against. Though 2 Tim 3:5 was written 2000 years ago, it is very descriptive of what we see today in American religion: "having a form of godliness but denying its power."

I will post now and tomorrow discuss what I consider true freedom and true power from the Bible's perspective. I will also contrast this freedom with the enslavement offered by the FFRF despite its surface claim to the contrary.

The full armor

Scott Green preached a great sermon last week. I was reflecting on it this morning and had some thoughts. The key passage for me was Eph 6:10-20, the classic treatise on the spiritual battle. The first thing Paul addressed was the fact that the struggle is not against the people in our lives (e.g., workmates or family members), but rather against dark spiritual forces. This is the reality. Therefore, we need protection. I did some deeper reflections on each of the armor elements based on my limited knowledge of war as well as my 1.5 years training in kung fu.

Taking your stand
The Bible says, "when the day of evil comes", not IF. All of us will be tested and go through challenges. This is a spiritual reality. I want to work really hard so I can get to an easy point and from then on can relax. But this is not how God set up this life! Days of evil will come my way, often evil of my own making due to my sin, and sometimes others' sin. It is at those moments that I must take my stand.

I want you to reflect with me on the battle and what happens when you stop taking your stand. The Roman army was legendary for having very large shields that formed a nearly impenetrable wall as they advanced. Attackers typically shot the arrows first. With the shields in place and an "advancing" mentality, the soldiers were relatively safe. But think about what happens if everyone gets afraid and turns and runs. Suddenly everyone is vulnerable to the attack of the arrows.

In kung fu, if we could get someone to turn their back to us, then this placed them at a disadvantage and in a vulnerable position. Arms were made to work forwards, not backwards! If I have someone's back to me, suddenly I can do whatever I want to their head and neck and they can do relatively nothing. It's a matter of time before they are on the ground in a submission hold (not that I advanced that far to learn all those techniques :-).

Spiritually speaking, we have to be ready to take our stand. If we flee, we give up ground and eventually the enemy will overtake us. Think about how Europe kept giving up land to Hitler trying to pacify him until Hitler had literally run the opposing armies into the ocean, necessitating D-Day to reestablish that key beachhead!

The great thing about a relationship with God is that he always has our back. Ecclesiastes 4:12 states, "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." In the body of Christ, we have so many resources to confess, get advice, and get help so that we can take our stand. Individually, we have to take our daily stand against sin. Evangelistically, it is a huge challenge to consistently take a stand alone. That's why Jesus sent us two by two (Mark 6:7).

Evangelistic Feet
Paul urges the Ephesians to possess "feet fitted with the readiness that ocmes from the gospel of peace." Despite multiple attempts, I've really never made a lot of sense of this element until today. My first realization was that the apostles were commissioned and literally sent out on foot to "go make disciples of all nations" (Mt 28:18). Their feet had to be ready to carry them. Location was the biggest barrier between people and the gospel.

Today, we have no such barriers. The world is relatively small. 4 out of 6 billion people on this planet own a cell phone. What needs to be ready is my tongue and mouth. What holds me back? Not being, thinking, & speaking on my feet! Think about it: if you're sitting or lying down, it takes time to get on your feet before you can take action. I was in the grocery store on Friday Nov 6. I ran into a guy I know. It had been a long time since I'd seen him and he'd gone through a lot. I gave him a hug and was warm and loving, which I hope made a difference. But I didn't take any actions that could multiply that love I had for him. Fortunately, God gave me an idea that I should invite him to our Family Group dinner after church on Sunday. 2 minutes later he wheeled his kids around the aisle again past me and I stopped him and we exchanged phone numbers and he expressed an interest. Sometimes we're not ready the first time, but God gives us a second chance if we want to be ready!

Fear holds me back too. But there's a solution: prayer! Paul himself requested prayer in v19-20 that he could proclaim the gospel fearlessly as he should. We all feel fear when we think about whether or not we'll share our faith. But courage is action in the face of fear. At Landmark we did a great exercise that helped me understand that people are just as much or more afraid of me than I of them! If you feel fear, tell yourself and Satan, "I acknowledge my fear and thanks for sharing, now I'm going to obey God and act to make a difference in this world!"

The Importance of Readiness
In kung fu, we worked on our footwork all the time. Why? You stand on your feet. Duh. But what can you do while you're on your feet? Fight. If you're off your feet, it's a grappling battle on the ground and you are much more likely to get hurt. Ultimate Fighting is all about taking out the other guys' legs. In Paul's day, anyone whose leg was injured suddenly became a liability and his buddies had to protect him and get him off the battlefield. It literally took someone out of the attack and the battle in order to help the guy who was off his feet.

This is why evangelism is so key. If we're not on our feet advancing the gospel on a daily basis, we are way more vulnerable to Satan's attacks. Satan wants us to get us off our feet and then it can take a tremendous amount of effort for the Christians around us to get us back on our feet, fighting the fight for others' souls.

When I'm not being evangelistic, I am playing a game that is way too small. Christianity becomes merely a game of church attendance and attempting to stay consistent in reading my Bible and praying. When I considered myself in "top fighting form" is when I was studying the Bible with several guys at the UW. Quiet Times and prayer times and times with brothers were absolutely essential to get strength and get training and stay close to God. I was in touch with the power of sin and Satan's ability to take me out.

I have already confessed to many that I was out of the game, but praise God that I have recently gotten back in the game and in the fight. If you're battling discouragement like I was, if you're not having Quiet Times 7 days a week, if getting to midweek and church early is a constant struggle, then getting back in the evangelistic fight is exactly what you need! Wading back in gradually isn't going to work for you! God wants us to play a much bigger game than simply staying saved ourselves. God is a genius--he knows that we do much better spiritually when we're unconcerned for ourselves and concerned for others. I naturally do way better spiritually when I am considering and meeting others' needs above my own.

Let's stay on our feet so that we can fight with our sword, which is the word of God!

The Shield of Faith
Faith is an amazing tool. The Bible explicitly says that it can extinguish the flaming arrows of the evil one. I naturally think of this applying to myself. My faith helps me overcome the evil thoughts and insecurities and fears that come to my mind throughout the day.

But this morning I considered how my faith can be a shield for others. Jesus acknowledged the faith of the paralytic's friends in Mark 2:5. Galatians 6 states, "carry each other's burdens" (v2) but also that "each one should carry his own load" (v5). I realized that my faith can literally be a shield for someone who is off their feet, who is being attacked by Satan's arrows. I cannot shield them indefinitely, but for a time I can certainly lend a hand. When I'm in a conversation with someone and I see a flaming arrow Satan has put into their minds, I can literally say something based on my faith and extinguish it for them. God can use our little faith the size of a mustard seed to disarm powerful weapons Satan is trying to use against others!

Shields can also be used as weapons. In particular, fight scenes from "Gladiator" come to mind for some reason, but also from Prince Caspian when Peter fights the evil Miraz. Sometimes we may not know the perfect scripture that applies to a situation. Sometimes we're literally out of practice in our use of the "sWord of God." However, our faith can still be an effective weapon. I love Tom Jones' mind change formula, which goes: "Situation blah, blah, blah and excuse blah blah blah--but God." He acknowledges the situation and then by faith brings God into the picture, which totally changes everything.

Conclusion
May we all enter our days fitted with the full armor of God. If you're not on your feet, then call someone and get help getting back up so you can fight the good fight of faith and finish the race!

Jealousy

A new situation in my life has sparked feelings of jealousy in a way I have not experienced before. From dictionary.com:

Envy and jealousy are very close in meaning. Envy denotes a longing to possess something awarded to or achieved by another: to feel envy when a friend inherits a fortune. Jealousy, on the other hand, denotes a feeling of resentment that another has gained something that one more rightfully deserves: to feel jealousy when a coworker receives a promotion. Jealousy also refers to anguish caused by fear of unfaithfulness.

Retrospectively, I have certainly experienced jealousy, but very seldom. Most of my feelings were really envy since there was not any self-justification involved. However, I'm realizing that the level of pain is definitely intensified by the closeness of the relationship involved.

This blog will explore the concept of jealousy from a Biblical perspective. I see these new feelings as an opportunity to feel some of the things I know that God feels. Yet I also know that while his emotions are completely appropriate, I must necessarily work through my emotions and get over them.

God is a Jealous God
As part of the 10 commandments, Exodus 20:4-7 summarizes how God's rule and what he feels about our loyalty to him.

You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments. You shall not misuse the name of the LORD your God, for the LORD will not hold anyone guiltless who misuses his name.

Ex. 34:14 expresses a similar sentiment. "Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God."

So what's up with this and how is it even relevant? I know so many of us struggle with bowing down before idols and worshipping Baal :-). In society today, we view jealousy as a negative emotion reserved for those whose lives and feelings are out of control. Marriages are by far the most common scenario for jealousy where the relationship has broken down to the point where one spouse accuses the other of disloyalty and unfaithfulness. Interestingly, scores of TV shows are based largely on emotions related to jealousy.

Relationship with God = Marriage
The truth is that God views our relationship with him precisely as a marriage. Hosea was an old testament prophet whom God commanded to take a wife (Gomer) who lived as a prostitute. God' intent was through Gomer's unfaithfulness, Hosea would understand a fraction of the emotions that God felt toward his people, the Jews.

Jealousy is a funny thing. A jealous spouse expresses great love and depth of feeling for the other. At the same time the jealous spouse also feels outrage, anger, animosity, and a desire to harm or hurt the object of their love. Jealousy is an extremely powerful emotion, as Proverbs 27:4 describes: " Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?."

Hosea 11 is one of my favorite chapters in the Bible because it shows the complete range of God's emotions toward us. At first, God feels tenderness as he remembers raising Israel as a child. Next, there is sudden outrage and vindictive punishment in versus 6 & 7 because of their many sins. Lastly, in v8-11, God relents and decides to have mercy on his people after all.

Ezekiel 16 is a graphic and detailed depiction of how God viewed his relationship with his people. It describes how God found Israel as a pitiful, helpless female baby lying in a field having just been born. God raised this child, bestowing many gifts, and the child became a beautiful woman. God entered into an exclusive covenant relationship of marriage. Yet Israel chose to go after other lovers and use the very gifts God had given to attract new lovers. In fact, she got so bad that she was a "reverse prostitute" and paid others in order to have sex with them. God's jealousy is so aroused that he must punish her violently and then he promises (v42) to be calm and no longer angry. If you read the chapter, you will see that God feels both like a rejected father/benefactor and like a jilted lover--and rightly so!

At the end of the day, God still loves his people and wants to take them back. "So I will establish my covenant with you, and you will know that I am the LORD. Then, when I make atonement for you for all you have done, you will remember and be ashamed and never again open your mouth because of your humiliation, declares the Sovereign LORD" (Ezek 16:62-63). This is entirely consistent with the parable of the prodigal son that Jesus told in Luke 15. The son comes to his senses and returns, yet only through his complete humility and the amazing generosity of the father is he able to yet again enjoy the privileges of being a son.

What is an idol?
In Bible times, idols were easy to spot. They were figurines of various sizes manufactured from wood, stone, and precious metals. Isaiah 44:6-23 contains a humorous comparison between God and idols, outlining the many absurdities of idol worship.

People joke today about idols, golden calves, Baal, and the like. It seems funny and superficially appropriate because our enlightened minds could not possibly worship such objects. But now that we understand the deeper meanings involved, it is most certainly not a joking matter. Imagine that you know a couple whose marriage has gone through the drama of infidelity and has finally been restored. Suppose you knowingly joked that everyone should get together for dinner sometime at the hotel where the husband had often met his lover? Such a remark would show complete insensitivity to the situation and the depth of the wound that had been healed.

But what is an idol? Do they exist today? Ezek. 14:1-7 explains that we can set up idols in our hearts. An idol is anything in our lives that takes the #1 place of importance that God deserves. While we may not bow down to anything physical, we show what matters most to us by how we spend our time, what we talk about, and areas we would not be willing to sacrifice in order to follow Jesus as his disciple. The range of idols can be tremendous and society actually approves of many of these idols:

• Our (grand)children, a relationship, or a spouse (always a challenge to avoid)
  
• Sports (football is notorously common)
• Our own beliefs and opinions and ideas about life and morality (this was a big one for me)
  
• Entertainment (actors, musicians, movies, video games, TV shows)
• Jobs
  
• Well-meaning projects to help others (e.g., ending pollution or homelessness)
• Our church or organization: events, special beliefs, special practices, etc.
  

It's certainly not hard to have an idol (or 2 or 3!). In fact, without conscious effort we always will have an idol in our hearts other than God.

Conclusion
I know God wants all of me (Luke 14:25-34). All of me is all I have to give. It only seems fair since God gave his only son Jesus for me. God married me at my baptism into Christ on December 15, 1999. Now that I understand God's jealousy more deeply, I am even more determined to maintain a big difference between God and anything else that can arise in my heart.

Today, society likes to make fun and mock the jealous God of the Old Testament. I hope you can understand along with me how appropriate God's feeling of jealous emotion really is. Proverbs 1:7 explains, " The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline." It is not a bad thing to fear a God who loves you so much that he is jealous and crazy and vengeful toward you when you are not putting him in that #1 spot!

The 11th Hour

We got licensed as foster parents with the intent to "foster to adopt" a child. Rather than go overseas, we wanted to help children in our backyard. When we brought Ar'Mircle home from the hospital on May 8, 2008, we had high hopes of adopting her within a year. Since then a lot has changed and her situation is much more complex. Her birth mother has made tremendous progress and has successfully fulfilled on her social programs for the last six months. In the coming months, she hopes to have overnight visitations with Ar'Mircle, leading up to reunification with Ar'Mircle.

Ar'Mircle's birth mother wants to reunify with all her children and so the family got into a special program. The new social worker will visit us on Monday 9/14/09. I will post a status update then for what is appropriate to disclose. However, our previous social worker had a "final chat" with us and impressed upon us the very strong likelihood that Ar'Mircle will return to her birth family and that we will not be able to adopt her. We have been aware of this possibility for about six months and have cried and prayed and gone through the emotional roller coaster.

God has always been in control of Ar'Mircle's situation, but this is particularly evident now as we try to surrender her daily into her true Father's hands who loves her more than we do. Tom Jones' weekly Mind Change email a few weeks ago pointed out that oftentimes God waits until the 11th hour to act. This idea seemed particularly applicable to our situation, so I wanted to explore this idea more deeply.

Abraham
The first obvious example in the Bible is Abraham, the father of faith. God promised Abraham a son in his old age (Genesis 15:1-6). Abraham took things into his own hands by siring Ishmael at age 86 with his slave girl (Gen 16:16). God's promise was not fulfilled until 14 years later with the birth of Isaac at age 100 (Gen 21:1-7). Over those 15-20 years, I wonder how often Abraham felt that God's promise was empty words? How often did he get frustrated with the age and decay in both Sarah and his own bodies? Yet at the last possible moment, God delivered on his promise.

Gen. 22:1-19 is one of the most challenging passages in the Bible. After Abraham waited so many years for Isaac, God audaciously commands Abraham to literally sacrifice his son, just like the pagans commonly sacrificed their children to false gods. Many struggle with this apparently callous, unreasonable, and cruel request (forgetting that God sacrificed his own Son 2000 years later). Yet Abraham did not waiver in his faith, for he explained to Isaac in v. 8, "God himself will provide the lamb for the burnt offering." Abraham made it into the "Faith Hall of Fame" of Hebrews 11, which explains that "Abraham reasoned that God could raise the dead" (Heb 11:19). Abraham's faith carried him through the actions of trudging up the mountain with his son, preparing the altar, tying up his son, putting him on the altar, and getting out the knife. Again, at the last possible moment, God intervened and told him not to sacrifice his son. Instead, God provided a ram and commended Abraham for not withholding his son.

This story is gruesome to our 21st century minds, yet the lesson is clear. God expects us to put him as #1, even above our kids. By this example of Abraham's faith, I am able to put God above Jade, Ar'Mircle and River, even though I adore them. It puts children in an awkward situation of too much power when the children are a parent's top priority, even above the marriage. God's priority list of God, Spouse, Children has worked well for us as we discipline and train our kids.

Joseph
Joseph was the great-grandson of Abraham. As a young man (17?), Joseph's step-brothers sold him into slavery in Egypt. Rather than renouncing his faith in God in a strange country, Joseph served his master Potiphar with excellence, leading to his promotion to steward. His faith even enabled him to resist the sexual advances of his Potiphar's wife and then kept him going as he was thrown into prison. In prison, Joseph served with excellence and eventually God brought him out and made him second in command to Pharoah as he implented a plan to save all the people from an impending famine. We don't know exactly how long this process took, but could easily have been 15 or 20 years. I find Joseph's example of perseverance inspiring, and I take note that God acted at seemingly the last moment in Joseph's life.

The Israelites
Joseph moved his family down to Egypt to escape the famine. After they multiplied, the Egyptians enslaved them. 400 years after the move to Egypt, God explains, "I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt.... So I have come down to rescue them... and to bring them up out of that land into a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey" (Exodus 3:7-8). God raised up Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. I wonder how many Israelites even remembered God's promise after so many generations? How many of them wondered if God would really rescue them? Yet after 400 years, at the 11th hour, God brought the Israelites out of Egypt. He even arranged things with the 10 plagues so that the Egyptians wanted the Israelites to leave and gave them many gifts on their way out.

If that weren't dramatic enough, three after they left, the Egyptian army pursued the Israelites, trapping them against the Red Sea. God waited until the army was nearly upon them before opening the Red Sea for them to pass through, then closing it back over the Egyptians, destroying their entire army in the process. It was yet another last-minute deliverance by God!

Daniel
This is one of the most famous stories in the Bible. As one of the Jews in captivity in Babylon, Daniel rose up to prime minister, just under the king. The king's jealous advisers tricked him into creating a law that for 30 days, everyone must pray exclusively to the king. By faith, Daniel did not alter his practice of praying in his window facing Jerusalem. Consequently, the king regretfully ordered him thrown into the den of lions. The next morning after a sleepless night, the king asked, "Daniel, servant of the living God, has your God, whom you serve continually, been able to rescue you from the lions?" to which Daniel responds, "O king, live forever! My God sent his angel, and he shut the mouths of the lions" (Daniel 6:20-22).

Daniel certainly believed God would rescue him. But at what point and in what manner? By the king revoking the law? By the king sending Daniel away for 30 days on a special mission? By killing the lions? Yet God chose not to rescue Daniel until he was literally in the lions' den for 8-10 hours.

Peter
The rapid growth of the early Christian church caused the Jewish population to panic as many converted to follow Jesus. King Herod arrested Peter and put him in jail as a ringleader of this new cult. Acts 12:1-19 describes how the night before his trial, an angel rescues him from four squads of soldiers and leads him out of jail. Peter knocks on the door where the disciples are praying for him and there is a humorous exchange where the girl leaves him outside still knocking in order to tell the good news to the others (v.14-15). Again, God chose to rescue Peter at the last possible moment and apparently he never was brought to trial.

Jesus
The Jews anticipated the coming of the Messiah for centuries. The Dead Sea Scrolls contain the prophecies of Isaiah that describe the Messiah's roles of king and suffering servant in amazing detail. The Jews looked forward to the coming of the Messiah, and perhaps many had even given up hope. Galatians 4:4 explains that God waited until the right time: "But when the time had fully come, God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under law, to redeem those under law, that we might receive the full rights of sons."

The idea of the 11th Hour is not that God always does what we want at the last minute. Instead, by faith we are given the strength to persevere to the 11th hour and then by faith to make it to through the crisis, if that is what God wants. Nowhere is that more evident than the example of Jesus.

Jesus knew he must fulfill the prophecy to suffer for the sins of the world in Isaiah 53. He spent time educating his disciples that "The Son of Man must suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, chief priests and teachers of the law, and he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life" (Luke 9:22). Yet when the moment came for his suffering, Jesus said, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death" (Matthew 26:38). At this point, he prayed this prayer many times, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will."

Jesus surrendered his life to God to the point that when Peter tried to fight off the soldiers coming to arrest him, Jesus told him, "Put your sword back.... Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than 12 legions of angels? But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?" (Matt 26:52-54) Jesus could have been rescued at the 11th Hour, but instead he chose to suffer for my sins so that I could be forgiven and have a relationship with God. Sometimes an 11th Hour rescue is too short-sighted. The Faith Hall of Fame in Hebrews 11:39 states, "These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect." Sometimes God has a greater plan, a bigger game afoot that may require deep sacrifice for even greater gain.

The disciples were thoroughly disappointed and disillusioned when Jesus died. As they explained in Luke 24:17-24, "Jesus of Nazareth was a prophet, powerful in word and deed before God and all the people. The chief priests and our rulers handed him over to be sentenced to death, and they crucified him; but we had hoped that he was the one who was going to redeem Israel. And what is more, it is the third day since all this took place. In addition, some of our women amazed us. They went to the tomb early this morning but didn't find his body. They came and told us that they had seen a vision of angels, who said he was alive. Then some of our companions went to the tomb and found it just as the women had said, but him they did not see."

But it was not yet midnight on God's clock. Jesus had in fact risen from the dead, proving that even when it appears that the "fat lady has sung," God can do absolutely anything!

Conclusion
There are many more examples of God's last-minute rescues, including Samson (Judges 16:23-30) and Hezekiah (Isaiah 38). They remind me that not only can God act even at the 11th hour, he often (but not always) chooses to do it this way. Why? I'm not sure, but I know that last-minute rescues make it obvious that God has done it. When God averts a crisis that has almost occurred, it is clear to all that we need God, not only in crises, but every moment of every day.

I don't know how things will turn out with Ar'Mircle. I surrender her to God every day. He really does know best and he loves her most of anyone. And yet I maintain hope that God will pull out another 11th Hour rescue and our family will praise him because of it for the rest of our days.